Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Advice, Please!

Well, I'm not sure that our feet have come back down to earth since learning our wonderful news last week, but we are starting to think about the practical aspects of welcoming to little ones into our home!

The main thing I'm concerned about is whether I should put them in one room together or in separate rooms. They fact that both of them will have spent their recent months of life living and sleeping in a foster care center full of cribs and other babies makes me think that they both might be more comfortable sharing a room. I don't know if it would be too lonely for them to suddenly be sleeping in rooms all by themselves.

What I don't know, though, is if it will be difficult to have a toddler and a baby with potentially different sleeping/napping schedules sharing a room.

I'm curious if any of you have thoughts or advice about this. I don't think there is really a right or wrong answer, but I'm certainly open to hearing what others who have gone before me have done!

Thank you!

15 comments:

J said...

... put them together... :)

... they are each others constant... they are family... you can always move them apart.... once they are home and they get used to your family..

that's what i'd do.....

but in the end... follow your heart....

Brad and Carrie said...

put them together.

Ours have LOVED being in the same room. It makes for a few crazy nights of giggling and making forts, but I say that's great! Chances are, your 1 month old will take several more naps than the older one. So, they might only share one nap a day anyway. At least with our M, she's a really hard sleeper, so sleeping with the older ones has been no problem at all. I think it actually helped her transition. And I think it has done wonders for their relationship. And then, when more kids come into the picture, you'll have an empty bedroom to fill! :)

Heather said...

i say start them in the same room.
and then remember the number one rule of parenthood. it's all trial and error and just when you think you are in a groove, they will ALWAYS switch it up on you! ha.

i'm so excited for you guys!
now bring on the court date!

The Busters said...

Clearly, I got nothin for you on this one. :) But I am glad you are getting some good advice. You are going to be one amazing mama! I love that you are thinking about these things. So thoughtful and kind. HUGS!!!

Lindsey said...

Together. Alazar and Ruta have TOTALLY different napping schedules but they both can pretty much sleep through anything. You can always separate them once you are home, but for now they will enjoy knowing where the other was is at the moment. Have I told you HOW EXCITED I AM FOR YOU!!!!!!

The Wells Family said...

our girls are 3 and 1 and they are together.
they love it and it makes bedtime much more entertaining :)

Amber said...

Start together. It will be a comfort to them. They can probably sleep through anything at this point, so I wouldn't worry about different nap schedules. They're so close in age, they may want to continue sharing a room even when they're older. Ours all share rooms except for Caleb and he has admitted feeling a little lonely when he was younger because everyone else had a room mate! So funny! Granted we would need a nine bedroom house to separate everyone but I think they would all choose to stay together even if they had a choice. Just my two burr!

So excited for you, can't wait to meet Elijah's little playmate! :o) Praying for a speedy court date!!

Keep us posted,
Amber

Anonymous said...

I don't have any personal experience to base it on... but I would think that putting them together would be the best decision, at least at first. It would probably be somewhat comforting and reassuring for them to be together during such an adjustment. They'll spend a large chunk of their lives wanting to be independent and exploring their own interests, so save the separate rooms for when that time occurs.

teamwestblog said...

Put them together for sure! I'd also go so far as to say to put them together in your room . . . at least for a short while.

Robyn :) said...

My thought is put them together. However, if you have the extra room, maybe you could make that the older boy's playroom for now. A place that is for him and he can help decorate it and can go there when he wants, but still has the comfort of sleeping in the same room as his brother.

Monica said...

I just saw your comment on your blog. Congrats on your referral! We have been so blessed by our two boys! I agree with everyone - keep them together. And actually, we did basically what Robyn said. The boys share a bedroom and we made our other bedroom into a playroom. That way their bedroom is really simple without a lot of distractions and a comforting place to sleep. Our boys were quite a bit older than yours when they came home so I'm sure our experience was different, but I think it really helped them to be in a room together. Please let me know if you have other questions. And congrats again!

Anonymous said...

I was told to put them together when we brought home our 8 mo. old and 3 yr old! They do well in the same room. They don't wake each other up at all. Funny, they are used to so much noise. God Bless and congrats on 2 little angels!!
We also got 2 boys!!! Crazy fun!!

"Indescribable" said...

Just stumbled upon your blog, so I don't know what country they're coming from - we came home 16 months ago from Ethiopia with siblings; 11 yr old boy and 5 yr old girl. We have separate bedrooms for them but my daughter prefers to sleep in the extra bed in her brother's room. She has only slept in her own room a few times. He said she can sleep in his room til she is old. (So cute and loving regarding this)

In Ethiopia no one sleeps alone. They have the family bed, and if you're my son you've been kicked out and have to sleep on the floor b/c you're a thrasher.... another story though....

they probably feel better having another person in their room. kinda scary if you think about all of their transitions and unknowns...

I'll have to follow your journey now!

God Bless,
Maria

J at www.jellyjules.com said...

I'll echo everyone else and say, keep them together. It's so important for them to feel as safe as they possibly can, and they're going to be pretty confused by what is going on. I wouldn't even be against a family bed if you want it, or at least at first. But if that's not your speed, at least have them together.

Maybe in a couple of years, they'll want their own rooms. But they may not. They may always find comfort in having the other one there to say a last good night to, to share a laugh at their silly mom's expense, or gripe about their science teacher.

So happy for you both. And I LOVED your video. :)

allison said...

Together, for sure! Also, remember that they have come from someplace that probably has a lot of "white noise" that they have been used to. It may actually be TOO quiet for them in their new home! I know it's a weird comparison, but when I would visit my parents after living in DC or New York, I could NEVER sleep well b/c it was SO so quiet. Just something to keep in mind if they wake or have a hard time sleeping...well, in addition to the time change! :) Oh, Tracy! I'm so excited for you and can't WAIT to see pics!!! Happy father's Day to Brian!!