Today is Rodeo Day at Preschool!

Unexpected Blessings of International Adoption

When we were preparing to adopt across cultural lines, part of our training included watching some videos. One of these videos talked about the importance of not just trying to keep your kids tied to their culture of origin, but for the entire family to become a little bit (in our case) Ethiopian.

It's a tall order, and one which I hope I'm successful in filling. One thing that I really love about our church is their annual "Nations Sunday" in which there is a focus on world missions. On this particular Sunday each year, many of the world's flags are paraded in during a special procession and the entire congregation is invited to dress in clothing from other nations. For our family, it is a natural opportunity to celebrate our sons' Ethiopian heritage and for them to wear their special outfits we bought them when we were there adopting them.

Our family

One unexpected blessing of becoming "a little bit Ethiopian" is that I've become much bolder in introducing myself to people if I suspect they may be Ethiopian (or from any other African country, for that matter). Consequently, I've made friends with some wonderful women, one of whom has become particularly dear to me. Her name is Sophia, and I met her last year on Nations Sunday. She is a beautiful woman--both inside and out--and last year, she was wearing a gorgeous dress from her native Kenya. I introduced myself to her and we've been friends ever since. She is also the mother of two little boys.

About six months ago, she traveled to her homeland for a visit and returned with a surprise gift for me...a beautiful pink dress!!! It is a Ghanian style dress, and this year's Nations Sunday was my first opportunity to wear it. I love it, and most of all, I loved that my boys could see how proud I was to wear a beautiful African dress...it was a celebration of them as much as it was a chance for me to feel pretty!

Sophia (left), her two sons, and her aunt.

I'm so grateful for the ways our adoption of Jeremy and Zachary has opened my eyes and my heart to people and experiences I might not have otherwise known.

Our family was asked to be part of the flag procession this past Sunday, and when I saw the Ethiopian flag, I found myself dashing over and saying, "May I carry that flag? It's my sons' country!" I couldn't have felt more proud and somehow unworthy at the same time. I'm so blessed and humbled, too, to be a little bit Ethiopian.

The Help

Last night, I stayed up suuuuuuuper late to finish reading The Help. I really wanted to finish it before I see the movie. Can't wait!

As I mentioned in a previous post, we have had a nanny this summer (who is an old friend of mine), and she has been a huge help with the boys, not to mention a wonderful friend to me. Her name is Rebeca, and the two of us often find ourselves rolling our eyes/snickering at Jeremy because, oh my stars...the boy is so BOSSY!

"Mama, me ketchup!" he demands if he wants ketchup for his fries.

"Beca, me get down!" when he is ready to get out of his high chair.

We are constantly letting him know that bossing around any adult is a no-no, but as Rebeca says, "He is a real "jefazo" (bossy dude).

Hearing my black son boss around his white nanny struck me as such a wild juxtaposition against the scenes I've been reading in The Help, which is all about the black maids of the 1960s and the white families they served/the white children they raised. I'm so thankful for the courage of the civil rights activists of the '60s. It is not at all lost on me that our adoption of our beautiful African-born boys would have been absolutely unheard of just 50 years ago, and very likely frowned upon by our society.

I know that we, as a country, still have some serious strides to make in terms of overcoming our racial prejudices. Looking back, though, I'm so thankful for how far we've come over the past 50 years. My sons are growing up in a different America, and I hope with all my heart that no door will ever be closed to them because of their race.

I can't wait to see Jeremy's journey unfold before him. He such an amazing boy--loving, smart, communicative, and handsome! Now if I can just get him to stop bossing me around!

Che-Che, Mama!

Ever since we adopted the boys, Jeremy has said, "Che-che, Mama!" if he wants me to hold him or to sit by him. It's really cute, so we've kept it as part of our family vocabulary. One day, my mom met an Ethiopian expat living here, and she asked her, "What does "che-che" mean?" Her response was that it is what they say when a mother carries her baby on her back.

I love knowing that Jeremy remembers that, and it's funny because when we first brought them home, he used to ask me to carry him in the baby carrier on my back, and he LOVED it!

A few weeks ago, I decided to try carrying him on my back using a wrap my sister made me. It worked great (although he was HEAVY!), and it was so fun to be able to "hold" both of my babies at the same time!

Hanging His First Christmas Tree Ornament

Coffee Ceremony at the Gladney Care Center

Wednesday, September 1 was set aside for us to go to the Gladney Care Center, where our boys have lived the last several months while they've waited to be adopted. We got to tour three of the four care houses, see the rooms where our boys lived, and visit some of the beautiful children waiting for their forever families. Here are Brian and Jeremy standing in front of the Care Center where Jeremy lived:

At this point in the trip, Jeremy was really starting to feel more comfortable with us, and we didn't want to disrupt that, but this visit to the care center is part of the adoption journey, and it is the opportunity for the special mothers (the primary caregivers) of each child to say their goodbyes. First we toured Zachary's care center, and he was taken by a caregiver, and we were sent on our way to finish the tour. (We were told this would happen. The special mother takes the child from you and has some special time to say goodbye. They also buy a traditional Ethiopian outfit as a parting gift to dress the child in for the coffee ceremony.)

As we neared Jeremy's care house, he was calm as could be, and as soon as his special mother found him, she approached him, and his face absolutely lit up, and he went right to her...no problem at all! Jeremy's special mother is named Mami (pronounced "Mommy"), and she is a beautiful woman, inside and out! I'm so glad she loved and cared for him all of those months he spent in Gladney's care.

She immediately put him in one of the cribs and started changing him into his traditional outfit.

Can't you just feel how much she loves him?!

After we finished our tour of the care centers, we congregated in the living room of one of the care houses for a traditional Ethiopian coffee ceremony.

This woman roasted the coffee beans and then ground them by hand with a mortar and pestle. And then the coffee was served.

Soon, Mami and Jeremy entered the room and she presented him to us in his adorable outfit.

She was so strong and dignified in the way she handled her goodbye. She hugged and kissed him, and asked for a kiss from him (which he obliged), and she handed him over to us.

She posed for a picture with us, we thanked her for caring for our son, and then she walked out of the room...and as she walked away, my mom saw her wiping away tears from her eyes.

This is Zachary with his special mother, Hiwot:

We didn't get to spend as much time talking with Hiwot as we did with Mami, but one of the Gladney interns said that Hiwot is a wonderful caregiver. We believe it! All of the children in Gladney's care seem so well loved and well taken care of.

After leaving the care centers, all of the adoptive families and our children went to Top View, a restaurant with a view of the city. Jeremy sat right next to me and shared my lasagna with me, and then he wanted to toddle around, and I snapped this shot of my gorgeous boy!

It was another amazing day in Ethiopia!

Ethiopia - Day 5 - Visit #2 With the Boys + Surprise Coffee Ceremony + Dinner at Fasika = Best Birthday Ever!!!

I woke up on August 5th (my 36th birthday!!!) with the joyous contentment of knowing that I was the mother of two wonderful boys. Our first thing on the agenda that day was to go visit them at the care center. We decided to go visit Jeremy in his environment, so we went to the toddler room first, armed with bubbles and balloons, hoping that this visit with him would be more fun for him than the last one. And it was!

After we played with him (and the other kids) for a while, the care givers brought out breakfast, and we got to feed him, which was fun! I love feeding my baby bird!

After breakfast, we took Jeremy with us to the baby house to visit Zachary. Poor Jeremy cried and cried again until he fell asleep in Brian's arms. This was our first photo as a family of four:

Here's our wee one:

I loved seeing his name written in Amharic:

After saying goodbye to the boys, we went back to our guest house, where some of the guest house staff had arranged a surprise coffee ceremony in my honor to celebrate my birthday! It was so sweet and special! Our driver, Solomon, bought me a beautiful birthday cake, and everyone sang "Happy Birthday to you" in both English and Amharic! It was awesome!

That's the coffee pot sitting on hot coals. Coffee is traditionally served with popcorn in Ethiopia.

These are some of the wonderful women who work at the guest house!

That night, all of the Gladney families were taken out for dinner to a fantastic restaurant called Fasika for a traditional dinner of Ethiopian food and amazing performances featuring music and dancing from various regions in Ethiopia.

These were two other Gladney moms who I got to know and love while we were there!

The dancers came around the room and danced with the patrons. I got to try out shoulder dancing!!!

It was a great day!!!

Ethiopia - Day 3 - The Oromo Countryside, Adaddi Mariam and the Alert Hospital Gift Shop

One of the fabulous things about this blogging community is having the benefit of reading what other adoptive families chose to do and see while they were in Ethiopia. We are so grateful to Heidi and Mark for their suggestion to visit the Oromo countryside. We decided to do the same trip, which is a drive from the city of Addis Ababa out to a church called Adaddi Mariam. It is about an hour and a half drive. Not too long at all, and we got to see the most beautiful countryside. I would highly recommend this trip as an opportunity to see something outside of the city.

Farming still done with yoked oxen.

At one point on our trip, we shared the road with these donkeys!

And hello! Horse taxi!

About two thirds of the way out to Adaddi Mariam, we came to the Awash River, where we got out...

...and encountered these beautiful faces!

And soon, we arrived at this sign, where we turned off on a dirt road that we stayed on for seven more miles to the church.

Along the way, the sites were amazing...

Farming communities living in these grass roof houses. We also saw dung ovens used for cooking that I had only ever read about in social studies class growing up!

We arrived at Adaddi Mariam, which is the last of the rock hewn churches built by Saint Lalibela. It is an unfinished church. We were told that God told Lalibela that his work on the church was done and that he needed to go home because a visitor was awaiting him there. So he made the long trek home, and upon his arrival at home, he died.

The church is carved out of a rock and is underground. Here is our driver Solomon at the top, looking down on the church.

We walked down some stairs to enter the church.

Here we are inside of the outermost portion of the church. Most Orthodox churches are built on the model of the Old Testament tabernacle, in three concentric circles--the innermost part reserved for (a replica of) the arc of the covenant. The Ethiopian Orthodox people believe that the original arc of the covenant exists in a church in Axum in the Tigray region of Ethiopia. I confess that I tend to believe it is true.

The outside walking area around the church.

After our day in the countryside, we stopped at the Alert Hospital, which is a leprosy hospital. There is a whole community of men and women (some who are patients and some who are not) who make the most beautiful hand embroidered cloths. This woman was actually spinning yarn from cotton. It was amazing, and something I'd never seen before in my life! There was a man who wove the yarn into fabric on a loom and then lots of women were doing the hand embroidery.

All of the goods they make are sold in a gift shop right there on the hospital grounds and all of the funds go back to the people who make them. The things they make are just beautiful, and I would highly recommend stopping by the Alert Hospital if you are a traveling family!